During the process of writing this short series of posts about crafting as a perfectionist, I did a lot of self-reflection and evaluation about my current state and where I want to go in life and what I need to build on in order to get there.
I realized that I still have a lot to learn! One thing that I became painfully aware of is the fact that while I’ve come a long way from where I was, there are still plenty of instances in my daily life where I let the fear of failure determine how I tackle certain projects and tasks. I have been procrastinating a LOT on learning some new techniques and trying new things. I have been delaying learning and devoting time to building a business in a healthy way. I kept telling myself it was burn out but the reality is I had become paralyzed with indecision. I had walked away because I didn’t know which path to take and I had a lot fear over not being successful at the end of the day. I also had a lot of fear over becoming successful. I had lot of anxiety about how to make sure my kids received what they needed from me as a mother while devoting time to building a business that, surprisingly, takes a lot of time to build.
The funny thing is that literally a week or so ago, I listened to a podcast from Corinne Crabtree. She runs a business call Phit-n-Phat and is a weightloss coach for women to help with the mindset around losing weight rather than just throwing another diet plan at them. She was talking about the perfectionism that is felt in the weightloss industry and that if you don’t do things the exact right way, you won’t success. At least, that’s what women tend to tell themselves. Corinne’s point (which I’ve heard in several other podcasts of hers) is that it isn’t going to be perfect. You are going to make mistakes and, in fact, you should make mistakes in order to learn. Mistakes are not failures. They are just something we try on our quest to find what works for us.
One of things she mentioned in the discussion was a book that she had read that touches on how we self-sabotage our goals and progress. While she was referencing this book in the context of weightloss, I have found that many of her podcasts and the mindset of weightloss carries over in nearly every aspect of daily life. Especially if you are an overweight or obese woman.
This podcast got my mind working and I started to wonder if there were books specifically centered around the perfectionist mindset and sure enough, there are!
I’ve added these two books to my To Be Read list: “How to be an Imperfectionist” by Stephen Guise and “The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism” by Sharon Martin.
If you have any other recommendations for how to change the perfectionist mindset, please let me know!